I have a countdown on my phone. It says I will be flying out in 18 hours. I should be sleeping. I'm honestly exhausted.. But my brain is in overdrive.
Logan today was very sad about me leaving. Telling me that a year WAS in fact a very long time. 365 days. I didn't have the heart to tell him it might be longer. But honestly... A year isn't actually that long. It just seems that way to an 11 year old. It still broke my heart. Especially these random moments of bonding I have had with my nieces and nephews. Especially Kaylie. She's the coolest kid. I'm gonna miss her even more now.
I have been anxious all this week.. I get lost in my thoughts and then get a contorted expression on my face. There have been so many times Bekki has asked me what was wrong, to realize that I have a sour expression. As much as I have my freak-outs about moving to another country.. what makes me anxious is going back to school. Yes, different country, city and people. I'm not terribly concerned about it. I'll get lost, I'll wonder.. I'll have my uber anxiety and panic. This is standard. In my head at least, this will be a breeze. A very exciting, friggin epic.. breeze..? But it's school and papers and everything else that really send me spiralling.
Deep breath.
My mom said that it would be abnormal if I wasn't concerned.. anxious... all of those feelings that are piling down on me. It's all normal.
Thank goodness Christine will be with me for the first two weeks. Seriously.
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