And then the doubts set in...
What if I'm making the most horrible mistake EVER! (Yea, calm down, Amanda. It's not a permanent thing if you don't want it to be.) What if there's something waiting here for me? What if I'm supposed to stay here for some reason? It seems SO much easier. I've made some pretty spectacular friends and I'd hate to leave them! Especially to a place where there aren't really people I know my age. Finding work, finding a place to live... it all seems like this pending doom of fear and blackness.
I have a hard time reading myself and the things I'm supposed to do. I decided ages ago that I'm moving, and I was cool with it. Am cool with it. I just hate to leave you. I also decided that if it was wrong, God needed to smack me in the head with a 2x4, because I wouldn't know otherwise.
This is totally my fear talking, but... sometimes I wish for that 2x4.
3 comments:
Oh good luck Amanda! I'm totally a 2x4 kind of person. I really don't want to be, but then I step back and try and think of what I'm doing to change it and can't come up with a thing. Ha. Anyway, you are awesome, and I'm excited to hear about the great things that are waiting for you there. What an adventure. They are scary, but so fun.
I need a 2x4 and sometimes a 4x4 to knock me in the head! I am struggling with moving too... do I stay here or do I move home in May? I feel torn between the two. Just remember if WA isn't right, UT will still be there! It will all work out! And I now have a reason to come to Seattle! :)
sorry for being an incorrigible Eskimo pie and not commenting more, but I AM a faithful reader of your blog, and for the record I think you will do AWESOME on this new adventure. I know it's probably pretty scary, but we all know how amazing you are (including Heavenly Father), and have great faith in your success. Rest assured that if this was completely wrong for you, you WOULD get that 2x4. As you don't seem to have suffered through any sort of concussive injury, I think you're doing great. It's nice to think we could be completely prepared for big changes like this in our lives, but truthfully, most of the time we just have to make it up as we go. We all LOVE you to bits. Keep us posted!
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