So I was thinking this morning or last night or something. When I talk to people and tell them that my mom is getting married this June, they always ask how I feel about it.
Well, here it is:
I am F-I-N-E! It will be weird because there is this other man, but I can handle that. It will be great for her. Because I sure as hell dont want her alone. I think that it is awful that she has been alone for this long. And I admit that it is a hard concept to think about and I am uncomfortable at times. I also admit that there is a good chance I will run away at the reception and hide in a hole in my house. I dont handle change well.
But here's the thing. As much as people ask and I respond with a hesitant remark- mainly just cause it will be weird- if I wasnt okay with it- I would be a demon from hell itself. When mom started dating at all- she dated a man in my ward who had lost his wife 4 months previous. Partially because I knew his wife and he was now dating my mom- I was not a pleasant soul. I was openly rude to him and I didnt care. So the people that think I am not handling it well, they can take their opinions and shove it- because I think I am doing okay.

Anyway. I have to read this Anita Stansfield book- Dancing in the Light. The poster board crap of LDS romance fiction. The story is told from the point of view of a man who loses his wife. I am so sorry, but this character is illogical. I cant imagine a man talking or acting the way this man sometimes does. And the crap that his family "goes through"- the fact that there are no bitter feelings and all forgiveness, is also illogical. But I think there would be someone(s) with some resentful feelings somewhere. I feel embarrassed reading it. I needed to get through half of it by tomorrow (done) and I felt weird reading it while I was on campus. Technically it is a text book, but no one else knows that! I hate being forced to read it. It is junk. Anita Stansflield- you suck.